I could have been somebody, you know?

A world famous ballerina. I could lift my leg up high above my head, touch the ceiling in our small cellar where I headed when I wanted to escape the hot air. I opened the front door with my foot everyday, toes pointed. I stretched, my ankles pressing against the legs of two armchairs and I’d bend forward, leaning on my lower arms, reading a book.

I set goals for myself like a page, a chapter, my feet as far apart as the armchairs could push them and I wore my hair in a high bun, neat and tight, like they do at the theatre a few blocks away. I  see them in their breaks, leg warmers, tights and all. They smoke which I don’t like, but I love all the rest. The costumes so dramatic and gorgeous, like princesses, fairies. Fairy princesses.

I want others to catch their breath as I leap across a stage, throwing my feet forward and backward, leaning into a strong man who compliments my routine, spinning but looking the same direction all the while, my focus point.

The carousel is spinning and the boys laugh while I pirouette through the sand.

by Shirin Azarvan

photo: Shervin Azarvan


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